Live 8: Its Time Has Come

The come-on:

- Every single day, 30,000 children die, needlessly, of extreme poverty.

- On July 6th, we finally have the opportunity to stop that shameful statistic.

- Eight world leaders, gathered in Scotland for the G8 summit, will be presented with a workable plan to double aid, drop the debt and make the trade laws fair. If these 8 men agree, then we will become the generation that made poverty history.

- But they'll only do it if enough people tell them to.

- That's why we're staging Live 8. 10 concerts, 100 artists, a million spectators, 2 billion viewers, and 1 message... To get those 8 men, in that 1 room, to stop 30,000 children dying every single day of extreme poverty.

- We don't want your money - we want you!


What a great idea! Why didn’t I think of it.

So, let’s see. 30,000 per day, huh? WOW!

They all stop dying, you say? Cool! So, at that rate, after just one week, there are 210,000 more children than there would have been. After a month, 900,000. After only five months 4,500,000 more kids.

Now, those kids have to live somewhere, and eat something. They need clothing, shelter, and every right the left can give them. (You saw this coming, didn’t you?)

Where does all that come from? Why, from the other group who cannot defend itself: the old, the aged, the elderly, the infirm. So, Live (at age) 8 really becomes Dead (at age) 62. And hey, WE CAN HAVE ANOTHER CONCERT!!

Who thought this one up? Tom Cruise?

Just one question: in five months, it’ll be December. Are those four and a half million extra kids gonna all be ahead of me in line at McDonalds?! Or, worse, in the bathroom?