Hasty Ruminations

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Saturday, April 01, 2006

A Collage: All The News That Fits

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- Domino's Pizza founder Thomas S. Monaghan is building a town in Florida to be governed according to strict Roman Catholic principles, with no place to get an abortion, pornography or birth control. Civil libertines and the ACLU should just get over it.

- Some folks are whining about the lethal injection death penalty. It seems to be okay for the pound to put Fido or Fluffy to sleep that way; why not serial murderers? The real problem: 150 completely evil people are condemned each year in the U.S., but only 35 are executed. It’s easier to get elected to Congress than it is to get caught, convicted and wasted. Let’s turn over the executions to the inmates and call it a day.

- They say there is a video tape of journalist Jill Carroll in captivity praising the terrorists and criticizing the U.S. So what? She did what she had to, and she’s alive. Now, if Bush and Rice would only do what they have to do.

- Scott Peterson’s family has offered $250,000 for the “real” killer of his pregnant wife. A pretty safe bet that they won’t have to pay, since Scott is already convicted. But here’s a thought: Maybe Scott, OJ, and Robert Blake can get together and start a company to find the real killers of their wives. It could be on weekly TV, opposite that American Idle show. (Idol?) What would you call it? S*M*A*S*H? Divorce West Coast Style? What do you think?

- What to do about New Orleans? Who cares?

- Russ Feingold wanted a censure vote, and nobody came. Oh, he got convicted Watergate felon John Dean, a lawyer who couldn’t even convince Richard Nixon that he was breaking the law. Good idea, Rust. I mean, Russ. Why was Dean there? Why, to sell his book, of course!

- Tomorrow is the change to Daylight Savings Time. Indiana is finally being dragged kicking and screaming into the 21st century, too. That leaves Hawaii and parts of Arizona as the only holdouts for not changing their clocks. Show of hands: who cares?

5 Comments:

  • At 3:27 PM, Blogger kenju said…

    Scott, Robert Blake and OJ Simpson! Why'd you leave OJ out?

     
  • At 3:39 PM, Blogger Greg Finnegan said…

    Kenju, I think I included OJ. My copy says, "Maybe Scott, OJ, and Robert Blake can get together and start a company to find the real killers of their wives." I hope that your copy says the same thing. We cannot talk about slaughtering wives without OJ, of course!

     
  • At 4:40 PM, Blogger brendalove@gmail.com said…

    Thanks for reminding me about daylight savings time.

    I didn't know that about Scott Peterson. That jerk!

     
  • At 10:13 PM, Blogger Greg Finnegan said…

    Brenda,
    Just part of the service, all included in the ten cents price.

    Here's Fark.com's headline on Indiana's first daylight savings change in 30 years:

    "Indiana's clocks to spring forward thirty years. Resident looking forward to things like electricity, indoor plumbing, literacy. (submitter is obviously from Indiana)"

     
  • At 9:21 PM, Blogger Greg Finnegan said…

    Breaking news! Italians are all upset over the murder of the little kid who was kidnapped. The kidnappers were worried his constant crying would attract the police, so they just killed him. Brutally (I won't tell you how - it's terrible - you must find out yourself). So, my death penalty comment needs revising. In the case of child abuse, child kidnapping, or child murder, "beyond a reasonable doubt" is too stringent a standard. "Pretty darn sure" is good enough; and there are NO appeals allowed, so the pervert gets whacked before sundown on the day he is convicted.

     

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